Netflix Alert: "Miami Connection" – Possibly the best "worst" film ever.

    Sometimes the new kid sleeps on my chest, one of the things I love to do with the new spawn.  Every time she falls asleep on my chest, I fire up the Netflix and watch something totally sweet.  Normally I’d feel somewhat guilty wasting time doing this, but in these cases, “I have to”, right?
    This time, I watched a film I had read a ton about, “Miami Connection.”  The story behind this film (correct me if I’m wrong) is that it was made in the 80’s and but then wasn’t really seen for decades until Drafthouse Films took the film and restored it for blue ray release in 2012.  Here is the plot description from IMDB:

A martial arts rock band goes up against a band of motorcycle ninjas who have tightened their grip on Florida’s narcotics trade.”

I was hooked on this movie after the first few minutes.  It was so terrible, that I loved every second of it.  The music, the costumes, the terrible acting-this movie had everything.

One of my favorite lines in the movie came after a scene where this guy and his goons were trying to get the martial arts rock band, “Dragon Sound”, to stop playing the club.  They of course got their asses kicked so they went to this other guys clubhouse (which appeared to be just a gym/dojo) to ask for their assistance and to strike a deal with him and his gang.  After they make a deal, the guy tells him:

“One more thing I should warn you about.  These guys are black belts at Tae Kwon Do and are pretty bad.”

I nearly pissed myself

This movie is a riot, and when the Black Belt Band plays their music, you get full performances.  Normally I’d be annoyed with something like this, but in this case, you can’t wait until you get to hear the next song! The band plays full performances shirtless with Karate pants and black belts.  It’s unreal and I suggest you watch it now!

First the trailer:

A few clips from this masterpiece:

For all Adult fans of "Road House"…

   Like I said in the previous post for the “Road House” onesie, my goal for a while was to design a pretty sweet T-Shirt for this movie.  I started with the onesie because I had an idea what I wanted to do for that, but the shirt was still up in the air.  Browsing the google images for Swayze, I found a picture that I liked and figured I could do something to.  The end result…totally sweet:

This is available in our Etsy, eBay, and website!  Remember, prices are the lowest on our website because we don’t get slapped with fees!

New Bolo Shirt!

    Earlier this week I decided to discontinue the original Bolo shirt we had.  I wasn’t feeling it anymore.  I felt that we needed to freshen it up!  I bring you the new Bolo shirt.

Warning:  Bad Ass

This is now posted in our eBay and Etsy store now, and should be on the website this week!  This shirt totally sweet.

Your baby or toddler is the Master!

   I’ve had many requests for this one.  Finally it has arrived in the form of a toddler tee and a onesie.  The Shogun of Harlem!  I have added this to our Etsy shop and our eBay shop and it will soon be on our main website.  Like other products we have posted about recently, this has also been made available for purchase right here on our blog.

Sizes and Styles
Long Sleeve 0-3 Months $11.00 USD Long Sleeve 3-6 Months $11.00 USD Long Sleeve 6-9 Months $11.00 USD Long Sleeve 12 Months $12.00 USD Long Sleeve 18 Months $12.00 USD Short Sleeve 0-3 Months $11.00 USD Short Sleeve 3-6 Months $11.00 USD Short Sleeve 6-9 Months $11.00 USD Short Sleeve 12 Months $11.00 USD Short Sleeve 18 Months $11.00 USD


Sizes
2T $12.00 USD 3T $12.00 USD

New Shirt!

    Yesterday I said I was working on a Seagal Shirt for serious fans, something that wasn’t comical like my other Seagal shirts.  The shirt is now finished!

The shirt is now available in our Etsy shop and our eBay store and will be on our main website sometime this week.

Movie Review: "Hard Boiled"

   
    After my action rant recently, I had stumbled upon a few cool blogs from dudes that are really into action films:  http://www.allouttabubblegum.com and http://www.mattmovieguy.com/ , who refers to himself as the “Direct to Video Connoisseur” (I am jealous of that amazing title).  These blogs are loaded with information on great action films.  It was on the first blog listed that I came across their 2011 list of the greatest action films of all time.  Way down at the #1 spot was John Woo’s “Hard Boiled”.  I had never heard of this film being primarily a fan of domestic action films.  I had only little experience with director John Woo from Van Damme’s “Hard Target”.  I loved “Hard Target” and after reading other reviews for “Hard Boiled”, I had to see what the fuss was all about.  Sure you can go anywhere to find a review of this film, but I think you will find my take a little different.
    The film stars Chow Yun-fat who plays “Tequila” who is a cheesy, over the top, cop who’s partner is killed in a gang shootout.  One of the gang’s high ranked members is an undercover cop named Tony who teams up with Tequila to take out the crime syndicate.  The film builds up to an ultimate showdown at a hospital where they both need to fight an army of gangsters by themselves, while rescuing innocent civilians and all of the babies.
   Now before I get into what makes this movie awesome, lets take a peek at other movies that came out in 1992 in terms of action films:

Rapid Fire
Under Siege
Lethal Weapon 3
Universal Solder
Etc.

By looking at this list from 1992, you can also get an idea of what has already been released prior. Maybe I’m not quite understanding why people consider this the greatest action film ever made?  If the reason is that the movie is so awesomely terrible and unintentionally hilarious, then I can agree.  Here is something that made me laugh out loud; a little taste:

This is just a sample of the things that made me laugh loudly.  Among other things were men on motorcycles that would explode after being shot and the undercover agent, Tony, getting shot point blank in the back with a shot gun from 4 feet away, not even phasing him as he manages to take out a bunch of gangsters and then goes to the hospital to reveal a very minor looking back injury.  There was also repeated use of the curse word “effing”.  Every other swear word in the book was in the movie so when multiple characters said “effing”, it made me laugh.  There was also a scene where Tequila bursts into the Police superintendent’s office with a sketch of a suspect yelling and demanding to know who the person was.  The suspect drawing was possibly the worst thing I had ever seen, mostly because it didn’t at all resemble anyone in the movie.

“Who is this super generic picture of!”

All kidding aside,….ok maybe just one more:

All kidding aside, the action scenes were good in the movie, but legendary and amazing? No way.  If the movie were made in 1982, I would have thought it was pretty amazing, but this movie looked super cheesy and low rent in comparison to what had been already made leading up to 1992.  Legendary, this movie is not.  Do I suggest watching it? Yes, its a fun movie to sit through and poke fun at.  Will I be pushing for a Chow Yun-fat t-shirt to be made?  Indeed.

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