Noob Onesie!

I’m going to try getting a few new onesies out next week now that the holiday rush has ended.  The new addition of the Amazon store has been pretty awesome.  This is a onesie I did custom for someone as a baby shower gift years ago that I meant to use as a regular design.  It’s simple, yet funny.  This will definitely get some laughs.


Now available in our eBay store, Etsy shop, Amazon Store, and at our website.

One Month!?

Time flies when you have an infant!  It may seem like your nights last an eternity, but a month has gone by and it doesn’t even feel like it.  What have I learned after a month?  Nothing stays the same.  You may think you figured out your baby, but you are probably wrong (unless you’re one of the lucky folks and have one of those babies that the literature says “sleeps a majority of the day”).
Some things we have picked up after a month:

1)  The Swaddle:  You read so much stuff online: “Swaddling is good,” “Swaddling is bad,” “Only swaddle for 3 months.”  All I know is, the swaddle is a life saver.  Our baby hates it, but there is no way she will sleep without it!  She doesn’t even come close.  Once those arms are free, she goes insane and her arms start flapping like shes trying to take flight, accept failing at it…..and then screaming because she can’t fly (that must be why shes screaming right?).  Then we go in and swaddle her, and shes out in 10-15 minutes.

Doesn’t get much easier then that right? Wrong.  The swaddle is amazing because she oddly is able to sleep, however her split personality kicks in every few minutes and you get bursts of rage as she tries to burst out of it.  It then becomes a battle of the sleepy baby vs the angry raging baby.  Even more annoying, if the sleepy baby wins, she may pass out, but then as soon as shes in anything less then a “deep” sleep, she will try and burst out even in a half sleep, which can sometimes result in a wide awake fit!  This can usually be tapered with a pacifier..that is….only if she allows you to try that…sometimes she just spits it.

“Come on sweet little angel, lets go to bed…”

All kidding aside, she is getting easier to figure out and anything she may do to frustrate us is usually forgotten instantly when she smiles (except for when she is making you really mad, and then smiles at you while you are pulling your hair out).

2)  So many baby products, so many promises:  Its so easy to get wrapped up in the world of baby products that promise specific results.  For instance, our baby likes to be rocked, so we bought this:


We figured, “Well, she calms down usually when shes rocked, maybe she will like this!?” This item ended up being great, if you need to kill ten minutes and get yourself a cup of coffee.  Its not a very soothing item.  The swing rocks sort of unnaturally which I think just makes the baby panic and get confused.  We seem to have the same results every time (although its getting better).  You sit her down, she looks confused, then starts to wave her arms in hopes of flying out of the seat and escaping us, which is then followed by hiccups and a full fledged panic.

3)  Bottles for fussy babies:   So after doing some reading, we thought that maybe the baby was so angry all the time because of the way she was being fed.  We were just using some regular bottles, some given to us by the hospital (they sent us home with tons of stuff).  My wife discovered these bottles online:

These things claim to reduce colic by 80%.  That sounded pretty swell in our eyes.  They have this odd venting system that sometimes makes a squeaky sound when shes eating.  When we first used this, our dog (who is getting used to being second in our house now) looked really confused as if we awarded the baby with a squeaky toy.

The results from the bottle were pretty awesome.  We went from a baby that screamed and cried 90% of the time she was awake (the other 10% she was eating), to only crying when its time to sleep.  We now get to feed our baby and then enjoy her smile with a little play time!  This product has delivered.

First Week Being a Parent!

    Its hard to believe that a week has gone by already since the birth of Amelia.  I’ll attribute that to the insane lack of sleep.  Its no joke!  You hear stories from parents telling stories about how you don’t get any sleep when you have a newborn, but I guess I didn’t take that in a literal sense.  You literally don’t get any sleep!  You can’t! The kid needs to eat every 2-3 hours.  Apparently this lasts about 3-4 weeks, and then your sleep window grows another 1-2 hours.  I’ll take it!

A few things I’ve learned being a new parent in week 1:

1) Babies love to eat.  Basically they say, if the kid is hungry then you feed it until its full.  Amelia is not shy when showing that shes hungry.  She does this mouth motion where she mimics eating.  That eventually evolves into chomping and sucking on her own hand…..which is then shortly followed by crying with an angry face.  Basically you want to recognize that shes hungry before you get to that point or else she starts to act like a little zombie.

2) Babies really love to shit, and perform surprise attacks with shits.  We have discovered that its not at all difficult to tell if a baby shits itself.  Besides the obvious horrendous smell, there is the ever amusing (at least with our kid) straightening of the legs, rigid stiff stretch of the limbs, face red, furrowed brows, and a loud wet fart.  Similar to the end of the ketchup bottle.  Once you hear and see this event unfold, its time to change the diaper.  This is where things get tricky.  We have learned to let the baby “shit it out”.  She needs a second to fully unload.  If you guess wrong, then you peel off the diaper and while preparing for a new one…..blam!  A hand full of propelled shits followed by a blank stare and a gassy grin.  You would think its super gross (and it is), but its surprisingly overshadowed by just how hilarious this cute little being is that is performing the act.

3) Our baby sticks to a routine. Throughout the day she eats nicely and then just passes out.  At night, she chooses to all of a sudden consume way more food, eat way slower, and create as many challenges as she can before she gives in and passes out.  Long nights.

So in week 1, these are the major things we have discovered being new parents.  Its frightening, but pretty amazing at the same time.

Punk Rock Alert!

    Musically I am stuck in the 90’s, and with my wife home on maternity leave, she is quick to send me text messages from the first floor of our home (I work on the 3rd floor) mocking me out with comments like “1998 all day”.  Like Metallica once said, “Sad but true”.  My roots have always been punk rock, and for that genre, I find that there aren’t too many new bands worth listening to. The “Heartsounds” are an exception to that opinion.  This band is awesome, straight up.  I blogged way back about their album “Drifter”, which was my intro album to this band; blogging about how great I thought the album was.  Members of this band, (formally the band “Light this City”) started Heartsounds to pursue their love for punk music.  “Light this City” was more new metal, a genre that isn’t easy to separate yourself from other bands (a polite way of saying that it all sounds the same and is mostly shit), however, even “Light this City” has flashes of makes Heartsounds a great band.  The guitar work is incredibly solid, reminding me of bands like “No Use for a Name” with the composition complexity of “Lagwagon”.  If you were a fan of early 90’s punk music, this band is phenomenal. Their new album is looking to be no different.  They have leaked 3 songs (that I know of) off their upcoming October 15th album, “Internal Eyes”, and each one is more awesome than the next.  These days, I rarely sit around anticipating the release date of a new record, but this one I eagerly await.

Here are the 2 songs off “Internal Eyes” that they have released to wet the pallet:

If you enjoy listening to music from the glory days and can’t really crank it up anymore because of an infant, your infant might as well listen with you while it wears this:

With not much time remaining, we have a nursery!

    Well, we were put through a whirlwind with the burglary, temporarily moving out, and all that madness.  With only a few weeks remaining (possibly earlier), the nursery is finally finished!  We took a disgusting turd of a room and turned it into something awesome.  I have taken the pictures from the other blog posts and compiled all of the process pictures to create this wonderful room.  For a while, when we were trying to sell the house, losing this room before the baby got to see it was brutal on me.  I was doing my best to deal with it, but I couldn’t let go of it.  I slowly started getting more and more angry….

When we had to make a call to stay or possibly not have a place at all for when the baby came, we decided to stay, I love our neighborhood, we just has some super shitty luck.  It was then going to be full speed ahead in finishing the room.  I want to thank all who helped make this possible and who helped us get through the worst two months ever.  It is finally done…

Girl or Boy….. the Bills are in their blood.

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